The Holidays

So Thanksgiving is next week.  And I know I have a LOT to be thankful for, and I am.  But the holidays are going to be harder for me this year.  As much as I know I'm blessed, the holidays are such a big reminder of what I still don't have.  The whole family getting together, old traditions, new traditions I would have liked to start, and even the simple act of decorating is going to be an "in the face" reminder of the hopes and dreams I had of a new chapter for the Martins.  Don't get me wrong, there isn't anything wrong with the current chapter, but there are characters missing.  I will do my best to focus on the positive, but it will be harder this year for sure. 

The other day, I was thinking about the Christmas three years ago.  I was late, and I decided to take a pregnancy test on Christmas, so if it was positive, I could tell Gus that morning.  Of course, it was negative and instead of getting really excited like I had planned it would go, I cried and had to explain my overly emotional state to Gus.  It is still hard to believe that was three years ago.  I can still remember all the details like it was yesterday. 

Well, this has been a bummer of a blog entry.  So I will leave on a happy note.  Gus has a new job!  He seems pretty excited about it and I'm happy if he is happy.  I don't know if anyone still reads my blog or not, but just in case anyone does, I won't go into too much detail about the job because I'm sure he will want to tell you himself.  I just had to end on a high note.