Do you see the pretty lights?

It started a couple of months ago. It was a weekend and Gus and I were on our way over to the house for something. On the way, I started seeing a blinking, zig zaggy, tv staticy light in my eye, making it very hard to see out of my right eye. I thought I was having a stroke in my eye, but Gus said I was crazy. The light disappeared as quickly as it appeared about 10 minutes later. After the light disappeared, I felt nauseous and had an extremely bad headache. I laid down when we got back to the hotel and a few hours later was feeling much better. Gus thought I had just had a migraine and that is what we chalked it up to.

Two weeks ago, the same thing happened, but on a much smaller scale.

Yesterday, it happened again, much like the first time. And by now, I'm getting pretty freaked out. So I start doing some digging and find the exact thing I have described and it is called "migraine with aura." They describe the light as "shimmering," and that makes sense. As I read about it, I find that if you have these, you should not take the BCP (birth control pill) without consulting your doctor because they both come with an increased risk for stroke. So I called my OB/GYN to see what he thought. He told me to stop taking the BCP immediately. (You may be asking yourself why I'm on it to begin with since I can't get pregnant, and the answer is to help manage my endometriosis symptoms.)

WARNING: The rest of this blog may contain information about myself and my cycle that you may think is TMI (too much information). You can stop reading now if you don't feel comfortable knowing this information. But if you keep reading...don't say I didn't warn you!

My periods are awful. And because I have never had anything to compare them too, I thought they were normal. Infertility has taught me a lot about myself, physically and otherwise. I now know that what I have been experiencing every month IS NOT NORMAL. Heavy bleeding, clots, and pain (not just cramps, but just plain pain) is all because of stupid endometriosis. There have been times I thought my uterus was falling out of me (I warned you to stop reading, you thought I was joking, didn't you?) and if I had known how useless it was going to be for me, I wish it would have done just that. My surgeries actually helped out, a lot. But it hasn't taken long for some of the symptoms to return. So I started on the BCP in April hoping to help curb some of them. So when the Dr. said to stop taking them immediately, I was left with a choice. Do nothing and live with the above every month for the next approximately 20 years. Or try the Depo-Provera shots. There are side effects, as with all drugs, but I'm willing to risk them, especially if one of the side effects is the absence of a period all together. I'm really hoping for that one! But with my luck, I'll be in the small percentage that reports the opposite effect. So starting tomorrow morning, I will be getting shots in my bum every 12 weeks in hopes of finding a "cure" for my endometriosis and if I'm lucky enough, getting rid of Aunt Flo all together. And because of the infertility, I'm used to shots in the rear, but I don't think the nurse will take the time to ice my bum before the shot like my hubby did.

Okay, that's enough girl talk for one day. If you stuck it out to the end, I hope I didn't scar you for life. And if this happened to be the first post of mine you have read, I'm sorry, and not all of them are this bad.